A note from Jaki (Continued)
… An aged attitude is just as good as a young attitude. Joyful living comes from the ability to utilize the inherent energy within each stage of life. Menopause and post menopause, as stages of the female life, contain their own unique and powerful energies—what Margaret Mead called “zest”. When menopause occurs and the physical and psychological imperatives of the female reproductive system ebb away, a new season commences for women and at this time in history it lasts longer than ever before. As life expectancy advances, it is reasonable to predict that many women will live as long after menopause as before. The question is what will we do with those years? Of course I support the pursuit of fitness and health but not to stay young, which is impossible. Health and fitness help you to be available for the wisdom and development which age can bring.
I direct your attention to an alternative viewpoint that could change your life by changing your attitudes toward aging and toward yourself. Such a change in attitude holds the potential for a double set of benefits—the first personal, the second to the world at large.
Begin to consider this perspective in your own life:
* Focus not on what is lost or fading but on what is new and stronger.
* Ask yourself what do you know now that you did not know when you were 20 or 30 or 40?
* How do you surprise yourself today in ways you never imagined?
I have begun with a focus on women because they have been the subject of my earliest research, a series of interviews with women between the ages of 45-102 in five countries, but don’t despair gentlemen, you are next. I welcome all voices on these pages and invite everyone to join in the conversation by contributing your ideas and feelings, your stories and plans, your pictures and videos, anything that offers evidence of the richness of life after 50, 60 , 70 , 80, 90 or even 100.
The pro-aging movement is building momentum and will soon sweep into the minds and hearts of men and women across the world. Together we will ban those “over the hill” birthday cards and prune juice Popsicle jokes. We will popularize lying about your age by adding a few years, and we will reignite our zest for life, celebrating our comfort in our own skin—no matter the year and model.
I am certainly not the first person to have this agenda. Carl Jung, Betty Friedan and Joan Erikson have all shared a message about the unique and significant value of the years 50+, but the time may not have been right for people to hear.
But now is our time. 2011 is officially the year of retirement for the first boomers. We must be ready to listen now. As this milestone approaches, I invite you to check in with yourself to find out if your attitude about age is blocking your enjoyment of something that is just too good to miss (i.e. your own life)!
How long will we live? Nobody knows for sure but longevity is on the rise and 40 or 50 years after your 50th birthday is a very long time to be living in what you consider a second class stage of life. The alternative is to embrace the next stage as an equal partner in your life journey.
We have made it our mission to help you make the change to aging fabulously and fearlessly. In the pursuit of eternal youth everyone loses. An older woman loses the gifts of age, society loses the wisdom of the mature woman and youth loses the hope of a deeper future. So you see this is not just about vanity or baby boomer angst. This attitude of fabulous, fearless aging is a social issue whose time has come.
We can’t wait to hear what you have to say.
Jaki here…Thank you for joining the conversation Divy. You sound like a fabulous example of someone who came to wisdom early in life. Don’t worry about the supposed to
messages that you are starting to hear. As you age they magically start to turn way down in volume until the only messages you are getting are from yourself and you will proceed in life just the way you believe you need to. And this is not selfishness , it is confidence and the a wonderful gift of age that allows you to be your own guide and helps you to let go of the opinion of others. But it sounds you are well on the way to that.
I think the “ones in the middle” as you call them are more wary because they have more fear about their own aging. You and I and all the rest who know that life is fabulous on both sides of 50 need to spread the word and help them out
Hope to see more of your fantastic comments
Everything you have said I’ve been Thinking! But, also thoughts like: “I’ve been ‘young’ my whole life…now I’m supposed to be just ‘old’?” I have more energy today then ever before and I’m supposed to slow down?
I’m supposed to ‘opt out’ and participate less? I am a generation in transition in both mind and body.
What we thought would be, isn’t! What we were taught to think is totally outmoded and irrelevant!
So now, just when I have the most confidence, skill and balance I’m supposed to close up shop and hand it over to whoever has the younger looking skin?
I did not come all this way, through all this grit, gravel and gravity just to whimper out 3/4 of the way through. I am very interested to hear what you are all talking about. I have always had a “place’ in society and all of a sudden there’s this 2nd class citizen look reflecting in the eyes of younger (but only by 15 years) men and women! The much younger are in awe and respect, its the ones in the middle I seem to be in the way of.
Anyway…this si a favorite subject and I applaud you for your research!
Divy Nelson
AustinVoiceLessons.com
singersdaily.blogspot.com
VoicesUnlimited
Thank you Ruthanne,beautifully put.Like you I have never felt more comfortable in this skin and it is my very sincere hope that Fifty & Fabulous can bring other women to this place or even just get a nod of sisterly agreement from those that are already here.
BTW Fifty& Fabulous,The Best Years of a Woman’s Life is available now on amazon.co.uk at
http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/1906787603/ref=s9_simh_gw_p14_t1?pf_rd_m=A3P5ROKL5A1OLE&pf_rd_s=center-1&pf_rd_r=05S16AR5CKT68H7YG8F4&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=467198433&pf_rd_i=468294
and is expected down there in Australia within 4 weeks.
Believe, you are fabulous!
I am so looking forward to reading the book when it is available in Australia. I am at a wonderful point in my life and have never felt more fortunate and comfortable with myself. Thank you for writing this much needed resource. You will no doubt touch so many women with diverse needs and one common bond.